It was 1988. I was naive or a young man of simple tastes. Life may have been less complicated for all of us then. We had fewer things to distract us or isolate us from one another. Some friends of mine introduced me to something called buffalo wings. This was long before fast food chains were built on chicken wings. A local dive bar made chicken wings and had draft beer and wine coolers. That was the entire menu of the bar. One deep fryer with two baskets and a hand written list of names waiting for their orders. A shuffleboard table and pool table provided the rest of the entertainment. The place was always busy. Those wings became one of my favorite meals. I would have chosen wings over steak and lobster.
I was young and in the military. We had two rules. Work hard and play hard. We were young and inexperienced but we had the time of our lives. During those days I remember making friends that I have to this day. We were from different places, races, and backgrounds. I didn't make friends with everyone around me, because you click with those you click with, but we were all on the same team and had a job to do that was bigger than ourselves. Living on a ship is like living on a microscopic slide of a sample of the world. The ship has a mission and only those on board can make it happen. Out in the middle of the ocean every man is dependent on each other to do their job.
We did our job and lived for our nights off. Eating wings and drinking schooners of bad Budweiser beer. It was great until the City of Long Beach California closed the bar down because the patrons were drunk and disorderly in the neighborhood too often. A sad day for the best buffalo wings on the West Coast. But life continued as normal. I remember those days without smart phones and social media. Being in groups of people and having a great time. Meeting strangers and having deep conversations with my friends. I can't remember during this period of my life having one discussion about politics. It wasn't that people didn't care, people didn't have to announce their political allegiance.
We never sat around judging each other over political opinions or biases. Our country declared war and nobody flinched or discussed the politics of the day. I know people cared deeply how this country was governed but we didn't have the strong division and hostile media coverage all those years ago. There was more of a collaborative spirit at one time. I know for me it was a far more simple time to live than today. I know this is an over simplification of life. It's a snapshot of a world lost. Simple enjoyment maybe lost forever.
Saturday at the barber shop a customer and I and a few others were talking about life out in the retail shopping world. The customer was telling me how he was at a local hardware store when another patron was telling him he should be wearing a mask. He chose not to engage the person. I understand this is a divisive issue. The masks are not the issue. The conversation turned to the fact that many in our society have become intolerant of any they disagree with. The days of finding common ground are gone. The rise of the importance of the individual has changed our world. My customer said he thinks too many people have to be the "star" of the show in life. They feel they deserve to have their opinions lauded and appreciated.
We've traded the simple life for something that is destructive. We once believed in being a good citizen and respecting each other. Nothing was ever perfect, humans are severely flawed. People are more and more isolated from each other. We are giving each other the silent treatment now. The conversations of life are not happening. Maybe I'm just an old middle-aged white guy who doesn't like the way the world is changing. Do you like the way way the world is changing?
I remember the simple days of life aboard a Navy frigate where we didn't all like each other, but we helped each other. Every man had his life outside of work. We all lived together and trained together. What you did after work was your business. Where you went and who you spent time with was not an issue as long as you were able to do your job. Seems simple enough. We live in a very complex world where it is hard to find solutions. Just keep it simple.